Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Thanksgiving: 2 vs. Skilla: 0

After spending my entire long weekend stuffing my face using the iron-clad excuse that “it IS Thanksgiving, after all.“ I have come to a few painful realizations. Maybe they are just carb induced diatribes… who really knows!

1.) Thanksgiving is a holiday based solely on the sheer gluttony of the North American Man. There is no other basis, as far as I can see, for this holiday other than for being a glutton for punishment… usually in the form of a ‘Turkey Day Coma’.

2.) Here in Canada, Thanksgiving works as a ‘gateway holiday’ much like a ‘gateway drug’, opening the door to the other more hardcore holidays like Halloween and Christmas.

3.) I hate when people want to attempt be traditional and force us go around the table offering up what we are grateful for this year.

**MY RESPONSE:**
“I am grateful for the people who do not put me in these akward, on-the-spot social situations.”

4.) Maybe I am being so cynical because I have been played a sucker yet again by this ever so enticing and seductive holiday and hate myself for it. I loath myself for the amount of time I will have to spend on the elliptical machine to work of the 5.2 pounds of mashed potatoes that have set up camp on my muffin top.

Thanksgiving, in my books, showcases as a holiday about thankfulness and tradition while I see it for its true colours: gluttony and guilt.